God, Give Me Patience

So my son, the one I talked about in my last post, the lover of the vacuum.... he drove me CRAZY today.  I wanted to take the vacuum and smash it into little pieces, put it in the blender, and then burn it.   He talked about the vacuum for most of the day and every time I walked out of the room, he pulled it out of the closet.  I caught him in the bedroom with it, in the living room, wheeling it into his playroom.  One time I walked into the living room and there he was, petting it, like it was his prized possession.  At bedtime, he said he wanted me to vacuum so I told him the vacuum needed to sleep.  Maybe if he thought the vacuum was sleeping, he wouldn't get out of bed to touch it one more time.  NOPE!  He had to sneak out of his room to see if the vacuum was laying down.  For the love of God!!

Today was definitely a test of my patience.

I did more Asberger's research today too.  I took a couple of quizzes I found that ask you a bunch of questions about your kid and it tells you the likelihood that they have it.  They all said he probably doesn't have it because he doesn't have any social problems (aside from the eye contact issue).  That's good.... that he probably doesn't have Asberger's... but where does that leave us?  Where are these crazy obsessions coming from?  What about his need for certain routines?  What about when he screeches like a 2-year old when something sets him off?  Is he just a brat?  A 'difficult' child?

I'm still going to talk to the doctor about it.  If anything, I'll be able to find out that my kid is just 'difficult' and I can be tougher on disciplining him without feeling guilty or worrying about an underlying issue.

Until then, God, give me patience.

And if you're reading this, pray for my little man.